This article is from my friend Scott McGowan’s excellent site, Eye On Adult.  I’m reposting it because it addresses exactly what I’m going for with Kink in the Mainstream.  Read it and enjoy.               

 Kinks:  Everybody’s got one, or at least that’s my thought on the matter. The problem is that, from my experience, most people don’t even know it, or at the very least, are scared to admit it. See, the world of fetish is kind of shrouded in mystery for most people, maybe even yourself. Hell, we have enough trouble talking about regular old vanilla sex in this fuckin’ country without adding in handcuffs and ball gags. It’s even worse for women. Even in 2007, should a woman admit in mixed company that she likes for her husband to pull her hair when they have sex, it’s like putting a big, red neon sign above her head that reads, “slut.”

Even with that being the case, I’m almost convinced that pretty much everyone has some kind of kink. Now, for the sexually undereducated, I’m not saying that everyone in the world wants to dress up in leather and had have a car battery hooked up to his or her nipple rings or some such nonsense. Instead, what I’m saying is that I believe that everyone has something that’s just off the beaten path, if not something that is by nature nonsexual, that arouses him or her. And it can be anything, really. From feathers to bullwhips, cotton panties to latex body suits, naughty nurse role-play to full on Dominance/submission, there are a million things out there that can get you hot and bothered.

Before I go further, I want to explain why I choose to use the word kink more often here than the word fetish. By all established definitions, the term fetish is reserved for non-sexual fixations that must be present in order for that person to be sexually gratified. It’s a heavy term, man. In fact, it really indicates a form of sexual disorder rather than something fun or positive. Now kink, on the other hand, though only loosely defined by dictionaries and always designated as slang, doesn’t seem quite as weighty. Ya know, can’t ya just hear someone saying in an excited voice, “Ooooh! Isn’t that kinky?” Just doesn’t conjure the image a dungeon with some hairy, sweaty Master type in an executioners hood patrolling his dungeon full of emaciated slaves wallowing in their own filth, does it?

Instead, I’m thinking of just some little thing, that in nature has nothing to do with the genitals or sex inherently that just kinda gets yer motor running. For instance, one of the things that has become kind of popular lately is women wearing glasses. This is evident in several new porn series like Specs Appeal. It’s just something playful and interesting that can be sexy. Hell, as I’ve said in the past, I have my own kinks!

“But why does everyone have to have a kink?” you might be asking yourself. Well, I don’t suppose one has to have one, I just see it to be quite likely. Ya see, the human brain, which is what controls our sexuality after all (not our genitals), is a very, very complex organ. It’s capable of amazing things, especially when compared to our cousins in the mammalian class of animals. Unlike, say, a dog, we are capable of complex emotions, choices of foods, whether to attempt conception or to simply enjoy sex without reproducing, innovate and improve our quality of life rapidly, etc. The list is endless, so I’ll spare you. My point is why wouldn’t the average, highly complex human brain just kind of take something around us and make it inspire sexual feelings? Take for instance, a nurse’s uniform, something I mentioned earlier. Now in our minds, what does a nurse represent? Nurses represent personal caregiving to a person that is sick or injured. They take care of us. No doubt, that inspires feelings of adoration at times. It’s well documented. It also inspires a certain sense of submission, seeing as the patient is would not be capable of asserting dominance in such a weakened condition. So, this naturally lends itself towards something intimate, not unlike sex. See what I’m getting at? Another example might be something like red lipstick. Any idea why that might elicit sexual feelings? If not, just think about this- warm, red, lips. If you’re still clueless, just think about some other part of the anatomy that when aroused, becomes red, plump, and also has lips.

When I asked my friend, Carl Hungus, who writes the fetish blog QuipsAndChains.com his thoughts on the topic, he responded by saying:

“Given the complexity of the human psyche, and the seeming limitless expanse of the imagination, I think it should be accepted as given that everyone has something that turns them on High. You may not know what it is. You may never know. It may be something as mundane as paprika on a hard-boiled egg. It may be as hardcore as yearning to live in a cage as a piece of filth sub. We humans are animals. At no time is that more self evident than when aroused. You know (I hope, dear reader) how it feels when your partner is panting and wild eyed, like a spooked horse, and begs/orders (whatever your kink, baby) you to, “Fuck me! Fuck me hard. FUCK ME!!” Hell yes, I’ll fuck you. You asked for it, you dirty slut. … Sorry, I, uh, got into character. The point is that our humanity is just a little turkey slice of forebrain. That’s it. The rest of the hardware we share w/ our animal cousins. As Robert Anton Wilson just spoke, in my headphones, “What the front brain knows does not control you at all.”

And I think that just about sums it up.

So next time you see a high-heeled shoe, a leather motorcycle jacket, a razor blade, a giant stuffed polar bear, or even a doughnut, just think to yourself, “I wonder if that would feel good.”

You just might surprise yourself.

  AMEN!
 

This entry was posted on Saturday, July 28th, 2007 at 6:23 pm and is filed under Kink In The Mainstream, Little Essays Toward Truth. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.